Rebound Relationship

Is a rebound relationship the best solution to mask off your pain after a relationship breakup? It usually takes place when you start out seeing someone shortly after a breakup of a relationship. Most people use it as a strategy to avoid the pain over a recent separation, but keep in mind that there are two parties involved in these relationships.

The rebounder is someone who is reeling from a break-up and immediately finds a distraction in someone new.

The reboundee is often unaware that they are in a rebound relationship. They are usually the unsuspecting party who is usually ends up getting hurt and feeling used once the relationship has run its course.

Visit Our Relationship Advice Column

Here some tips for both the Rebounder and Reboundee to avoid getting hurt on the rebound.

Tips for the Rebounder:

1. Most of the time a rebound relationship is a distraction employed by a lot of people who’ve just ended their relationship with someone. They resort to this because they are anxious about being alone and can’t deal being single.

2. Try to avoid having high expectations of your new relationship, and expecting your new partner will save you from loneliness. It's also unfair to expect him or her to be a “perfect partner”, and not do anything that resembles the mistakes from your last relationship. Before getting into a new relationship, make sure you have evaluated the reasons why you really want this new relationship. Don't use others in an attempt to get your ex back by making them jealous.

3. In a rebound relationship, someone usually ends up feeling used and hurt. You can’t expect someone else to mend your broken heart, and using someone else to help mourn your old relationship will ultimately hurt your new partner. It’s best to be straightforward and honest with your new partner about your situation.

4. The best thing to do before getting into a new relationship is to ask yourself if you’ve already moved on from your past relationship. You need enough time to wait to fully recover from the pain and loss. Recognize how much time you think it will take you to move on. If you were in the past relationship for a long time it could realistically take you a longer time to recover.

5. The emotional pain you are experiencing right now must be a learning experience. Your knowledge and experience coming from a broken relationship is making you a wiser, stronger and better person. Instead of rebounding, don’t be afraid to embrace and honor your pain and fully mourn before stepping into another relationship.

Tips for the Reboundee:

1. If you’re in a rebound relationship with someone who just ended a long term relationship stay away from it if you are seeking a potential partner who is emotionally available. People on the rebound are looking for ways to deal with their pain, and are not able to offer you the love you need. They are focused on getting their own needs met and have a lot of healing to do. Rebounders can often be dishonest, unhappy and confused individuals. Avoid them at all cost, so that don’t end up getting hurt. The bottom line is that you deserve more than to be someone’s rebound.

2. Never date someone who is still married, separated and newly divorced. There are many terms related to “still married” for instance, staying together for the kids, separated, working on the papers with the divorce lawyers and so on. People in these situations are not eligible for dating until their divorce papers are final. Marriage is a huge commitment, and making the decision to call it quits is a tough decision. Until they’ve taken the final step to end their relationship they won’t be emotional available to you. The longer you stay in the rebound relationship you’ll feel like you’re wasting your time with someone who can’t really be with you.

Return from Rebound Relationship to Home Page

Share this page:
Enjoy our site? Please pay it forward. Here's how....

Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it?

  1. Click on the HTML link code below.
  2. Copy and paste it, adding a note of your own, into your blog, a Web page, forums, a blog comment, your Facebook account, or anywhere that someone would find this page valuable.

Internet's Top Dating Coach - Evan Marc Katz - offers dating and relationship advice to smart, strong, successful women... Click here to find out more!